Leadership is lonely!
Any great leader I’ve observed—whether a political leader, CEO, university president, spiritual guide, or especially a truly good parent or mentor—carries a strain of loneliness, a weight in their eyes, a recognition of the solitary road they walk. I’ve had the privilege of leading most of my life, and one of the first things I teach those I mentor is this: you must have the courage to stand alone.
In leadership, there’s an unspoken rule: you never complain down. It’s a stance that requires you to rise above, to hold firm, even when it means stepping away from the familiar comforts of camaraderie. True leaders know they can’t always be the popular one. They stand firm and let others look to them, even when it’s lonely.
Parents know this well. Real leadership as a parent means having the courage to say no and the conviction to lead by example. It’s not about just being your kids’ best friend or trying to fit in with their friends. It’s about showing your kids what it means to live with integrity and to guide them with love and strength.
Over the years, I’ve felt this isolation profoundly, but never as intensely as in these past six months as I’ve released and gone public with my latest book, BlindSighted: A Journey of Identity, Faith, and Healing. People have asked me why I wrote it, especially knowing it wasn’t for profit. The answer is simple: it needed to be done.
Sometimes, when you’re called to something from the inner recesses of your soul, you need the courage to follow that calling. This kind of personal commitment may be the highest form of leadership—and it’s what I was called to do with BlindSighted.
In these moments of solitude, I find comfort in the words of Christ: “The birds have nests, the foxes have dens, but the Son of Man has no place to lay His head.” (Matthew 8:20). If He faced such isolation, then we too can embrace these moments of loneliness with strength.
Loneliness isn’t something to fear. It gives us space for reflection, clarity, and a precise understanding of where we stand—and where we won’t bend. If you’re feeling alone, use that as fuel to gain clarity, to focus on what truly matters, and to recognize those who genuinely stand beside you.
Remember, there is a difference between friends and friendship. You may have 10,000 “friends” online, but how many of them are true friends? Let’s have the courage to stand for what’s right, embracing the growth that only solitude can bring.
With courage,
Rich Christiansen
P.S. If you need more advice on how to lead your business to success, check out my newly revised book, Zig Zag Principle Edition 2.
