Our greatest opportunity as parents and grandparents is not to teach values. It is to model them.
This weekend, our family lived this.
When my sons were younger, Saturdays were sacred. We built businesses, solved problems, got our hands dirty, and at the end of the day we would sit down to a delicious celebration meal. It created memories and funded our family adventures.
This weekend, we brought it back, this time with the grandchildren.
We started with a full breakfast, all of their favorite foods laid out, everyone gathered around the table, laughing, connecting, just being together. From there, we called a formal Grandma-Grandpa meeting to order.
The first order of business was to name the venture. Every vote counted equally, from the one-year-olds to the nine-year-olds. Every voice matters in our family.
The vote was unanimous. The CCD Wildness Pumpkin Patch.
We then set the structure. Each time you work, you rate yourself.
1 – I showed up
2 – I worked
3 – I absolutely killed it
And each child gets to proclaim their own score. That is part of the learning. Self-evaluation. Ownership.
Those points accumulate over time and determine your share of the earnings at the end of the season. Yes, delayed gratification.
We also made it clear that this is a full-season effort. From planting, to weeding, to watering, to harvesting, to selling. Everything goes into one pool, and it is distributed based on your total points. Value contribution matters. You are compensated in proportion to the value you add. And yes, even the one- and two-year-olds understand this.
Grandpa also reserves the right, when a grandchild is working especially hard and fully committed, to quietly add an extra point. That usually comes with me putting my arm around them and telling them how proud I am of them.
It is something to see. Their eyes moisten. Their eyes light up. And in that moment, something deeper is being built than just a work ethic.
And by the way, you should have seen how hard my grandchildren worked. There is a real confidence that comes from that kind of effort. Lots of 3 scores were awarded, and they were rightfully earned.
This last Saturday was not a planting day. It was a ground-preparation day. Another metaphorical life lesson.
We cleared weeds, pulled thorns, dragged out old wood and trash, and worked the ground until it was ready. It was messy. There were band-aids. And yes, the highlight was Grandpa jumping into the trailer to stomp the weeds down.
This is the result of their effort.
One of our core family ethos statements is simple. Work hard. Play hard.
But here is the difference. We are not talking about it. We are living it.
We are creating cadence around it. We are building shared experiences. We are creating something together that gives us a reason to show up, to work, and to look forward to what comes next.
Next up is planting day, and the grandchildren are already excited to put seeds in the ground and bring this to life.
Values are not taught in a lecture. They are absorbed in moments like this.
I would love to hear from you. What are you doing in your family to create shared value experiences?
With clarity,
Rich Christiansen
P.S. I tell this story and give a weekly update in this video. If you like this format, please let me know, and if I get enough good feedback, I will make more.
Whenever you’re ready, here are some other ways I can help you:
The Values Blueprint Guided Experience – A step by step journey to help you clearly define your core values, create personal doctrine, and move from force into flow. Includes the full Values Blueprint and guided video walkthroughs.
Free Tools to help Calm the Chaos – Practical frameworks and tools designed to help you regain clarity, steadiness, and alignment in everyday life.
Legado Family– A framework and community centered on strengthening family systems, legacy, and generational integrity.
